Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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