Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Randomize