So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
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