I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
