I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
