Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize