I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
