Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
