who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
