grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
