she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
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