Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Randomize
