do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
