I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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