Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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