his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Randomize
