WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Randomize
