My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
