I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Who died my cat blue again?
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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