Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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