I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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