Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
