Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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