I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
I'm both gender and math confused
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
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