How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
