I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
