Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
