Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
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