I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Randomize
