hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
