Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
honey bunches of taint.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
