a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
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