I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
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