Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
