Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
