I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Randomize
