Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Randomize
