i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
