I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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