it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
That accounts for only three of the penises
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
