That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
