You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
