is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize