is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
