everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
