everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
