i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
