69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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