On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize
