Midget sex pt 2 tonight
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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