There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
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