I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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